colleges in india have banned all female students from wearing jeans. they say it's to protect them from sexual harassment. seems like it would be easier just to ban sexual harassment. that's what i don't understand. [ light laughter ] karl rove called maureen dowd of the "new york times" a bitter, twisted, deranged columnist and a dower, downbeat liberal and -- more -- a nasty, snarky person. hey, get a room. [ light laughter ] "get a room"? a new report finds that 1 in 4 pay phones in the new york city subway system don't work. the worst part is to find that out, someone had to touch at least four new york city pay phones. [ laughter ] yuck. [ cheers and applause ] congress is considering a bill that would force advertisers to lower the volume of their tv commercials. okay, how did my mother get in congress? when did that happen? venezuela has banned the sale of coke zero, because of unspecified health risks. still not banned in venezuela, actual coke. [ laughter ] a rule. [ cheers and applause ] that's fine. you can do as much -- "don't drink that. y